Ever had a day when you got up smiling, felt confident and happy, and had the most beautiful day?
Got a feeling that no matter what happens today you can handle everything that comes your way? With this feeling had a day where you rocked and smiled all day long?
Why can’t every day be like this – where you feel that you can conquer the world?
So what changes when you are happy? How is that when you are happy, your confidence level changes? Ever thought about it?
The one thing that most don’t realize is that happiness and self-confidence go hand-in-hand. The moment you choose to be happy, you start feeling good and confident about yourself and even appreciated. This feeling then works towards boosting your self-confidence. And makes us naturally unconquerable.
On the other hand, the biggest mistake we all make is that we often give the keys to our happiness to others. We often let the moods and behaviour of others affect our moods. If you want to have a successful and confident day every day, then learn to own your happiness.
Happiness is a choice and you can choose to be happy every day.
So how can I be happy? And especially during this COVID-19 pandemic when we are away from friends and things that used to make us happy? Also, there are so many things that make us sad every day, like –
- Maybe your mom/dad/husband and for that matter even a stranger said something you didn’t like
- Your boss shouted at you without a reason
- Your servant came late and you had to cook your breakfast
- You had an important meeting and your internet wouldn’t work
And so on. The list of things that make us unhappy is never-ending.
Let me start by discussing a story I heard a long time back.
Once Buddha was passing through a village and a local villager and a stranger stood in front of him and started abusing him. Buddha just kept on listening to him very patiently. Once the stranger stopped, Buddha asked him, “Are you done?”
The stranger replied, “Yes”.
Buddha, then, smiled at him and continued walking.
The stranger lost his cool once again and ran after Buddha. He grabbed Buddha’s arm and asked him, “How come you are still smiling? Aren’t you upset?”
Buddha replied, “You came to my house and gave me a gift. I didn’t like the gift so I didn’t accept it. So why should I be upset?”
In our everyday lives, we are so used to accepting things that we don’t like, just because we care what people will think about us or how will they feel. In which case, we don’t realize that rather than accepting something we don’t like and let me affect me, I rather say “No”. Remember your self-esteem, your self-love, and your happiness are more important than anything else.
We need to understand that what people think about us or perceive about us, doesn’t make us the person we are. We are made by the choice we make in life.
The only person that is going to stay with you forever is YOU. Hence it becomes paramount that we keep ourselves happy all the time.
I am sure all of you might be wondering what does it take to keep ourselves happy? Let’s quickly discuss some –
Quick ways to make ourselves happy—
Make it a point to thank people for even the smallest things they do for you, even if it was as simple as giving you a glass of water. It will not only make you appreciate the effort but also make the other person feel appreciated.
Every day at least exercise for 30 minutes. Exercising causes the release of endorphins – the feel-good and the happiness hormone
3. Do Things You Love
No matter how busy your day is, always find time for doing things that make you smile. Or like I often say – Do things that make your soul smile. Even if you are not good at it, do it. It doesn’t matter what the output was. It matters did you enjoy yourself.
4. Stay Positive
More easily said than done. Today the society and the experiences of others have caused us to become negative and look at everything from that perspective. I don’t mean that it doesn’t be practical. A common quote – “Hope for the best and plan for worst”. Whenever you are faced with a situation, ask yourself – “What is the worst that can happen?” Often you will realize that even the worst will give rise to a situation that you have faced previously. Have the confidence to face whatever comes next.
No one has ever been given problems that they can’t handle. You have the power to deal with what comes your way. And certainly, staying positive is an internal form of wellbeing to lead a happy life.
5. Take a Social Media Break
Today our smartphones and social media have become a part of our lives. Most of the time, even while sitting together, the whole family will be stuck on their phone, performing random activities.
Keep away that smartphone and have real conversations with the people around you and see how your mood changes.
6. Sleep in a Good Mood
Just before going to bed, do something that makes you smile and puts you in a good mood. And see the difference when you wake up the next day. You will often see that your mental state while going to sleep, will be the same when you get up in the morning.
7. Learn to Say “No”
A very crucial aspect that people don’t understand; rather than trying to keep others happy, do things that make you happy. Don’t feel like going to that party, don’t do it. Want to cancel that dinner date, do it. If it makes you happy, do it. You don’t have to always do things for others, sometimes we just have to like for ourselves.
8. Build your Support System
9. Help Others
A beautiful quote that I heard yesterday in a video by Dharr Mann – “You should always help people in need even if they can’t do anything for you”. Give a random compliment to someone around you. If you think someone looks beautiful, let them know. If you miss someone, tell them. You will often see even these non-monetary gestures will make people smile and often their smile will make you feel appreciated and in turn happy.
Most of the time the root cause of our happiness lies in worrying about the future or regretting the past. Its when you are in the present moment is when you can truly enjoy it and be happy.
Meditation is one of the best exercises that allow us to live in the present.
Each and everyone is different and each one has its key to their own “Happiness Elixir”. If you can’t find things that make you happy, just do everything that you feel like. Dance, run, draw read – make your list of things that make you truly happy.
Don’t let the behaviours and attitudes of others affect your happiness.